Learning How to Dance During Coronavirus Quarantine

How My Husband and I Relearned How to Dance

And how you can do the same

Getty Images Once upon a time, long before stay-at-home orders, I thought I was a perfectly fine dancer. Not a professional but not a cautionary tale either. Remember the time Carol danced at the Schmidt wedding? Then everyone shakes their head. Not that. Pre-quarantine, we used to leave our homes to dance. In my case, that wasn't a great idea. Brushing up on your dancing skills should be added to the approved list of in terms of usefulness and increasing your joy quotient. If you want to who are home during this time, I highly recommend a dance-off. There won't be a dry eye in the house. There certainly wasn't when my husband and I found ourselves with two upcoming events to attend (remember those?) that included dancing. We could have planned to sit that portion of the evening out, but we agreed that we didn't want to do that. We were still fun and, dammit, everyone would know it once we hit the floor. In the safety and privacy of our home, we picked a night to practice. I went first. "This whole exercise will be for nothing if we are not totally honest. Let's be supportive but critical,” I said. My husband nodded hesitantly because supportive and critical don't normally coexist unless you're having your annual review at work. But tonight, So You Think You Can Dance-Paul Edition would be more uplifting than a work review. My husband and I had never really danced together. We'd been together for over a decade but had and we were at the spot in life where our kids and our friends’ kids were not old enough to be getting married and our contemporaries were either married or remarrying quietly. Dancing not included. On the night of our personal auditions, we put on some music and I stood in front of the family room couch and began to show off my moves. Right away, I could feel something was off. I felt very self-conscious and cautionary tale-like. My husband had a raised forehead (critical) and a tense smile (supportive). "Are you being funny?” he asked. This was not good. "No. Are you being funny?” I asked. We went back and forth at this for a while and, for once, neither one of us was trying to be funny. His turn came next and we had the same conversation. "You can't possibly dance like that. Please be serious.” He looked hurt. "That is how I dance,” he said. I told him he looked like Snoopy from Peanuts. The evening ended shortly afterwards. I was not going down without a fight so I turned to the place we all do in times of need: YouTube. There are thousands of videos like “Learn to Dance Again” or “Learn to Dance as Wedding Guest.” I searched a smashup of words including “over 50-dance/don't embarrass self on dance floor." The videos had variations of the same simple advice. Just imagine there is a huge X on the floor. You move anywhere in the X. You can move your left and right foot anywhere as long as you are on the X. If you stand up right now and do this, you will see how easy it is. No one is going to cast you in their music video, but no one will point and laugh either. The X was pure genius. My husband and I practiced and were amazed that it worked with any song. We were able to critique each other while being sincerely supportive. The relief was huge. At the first event, we used our tutorial and felt good about it. We were repetitious as hell, but who was watching, right? Aren't we supposed to dance like no one is watching, anyway? At the second event I was frankly unstoppable. My imaginary X could move to any part of the dance floor. The only scary moment came when all the ladies were dancing and my niece whispered to me frantically, “You're in the middle of the circle.” A circle had formed and I had accidentally put myself in the center. I simply X'd my way back to the perimeter. I took a break and sat with my husband, enjoying a drink and watching the action on the dance floor. We were secretly on the lookout for anyone else who may have spent some time with online tutorials. Was anyone else doing the X? We spotted what looked like a committed L dancer. Maybe an H. It was hard to tell. I excused myself and went to the ladies’ room. A woman about my age smiled as we both stood at the mirror applying lipstick. "You look like you were having fun out there. I wish I didn't feel so self-conscious. When did I forget how to dance?” We both laughed. Then I brought her into the circle of trust. Actually, the X of trust and told her my secret. She thanked me, and it might have been my imagination, but she left awfully quickly. I went back out to join my husband and sure enough, I saw her talking animatedly to a person I assume was her husband. He took her by the hand and they joined the group on the dance floor. There it was. It was clear to an old pro like me that they were both doing the X. I nudged my husband and told him what I had done. "It's your legacy. Who would ever have guessed that it would be X-rated?" Even if you are a dancing machine, take some time before we are back in the world and dance — by yourself, on a Zoom, with the dog. Because we will all be back on the dance floor at some point or, at least, out of the house. I'll see you there.

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